For the last year, 5 days a week, 1-2 hours a day, I’ve been knocking out dark room practice and randomly forcing inner silence through gazing on the side. I’ve definitely had a few “what the fuck is/was that?”experiences and posted about them.
Unfortunately, somehow (maybe this is common) I started fooling myself. At first, I was seeing energy/puffs and short image reels, right on! dreaming awake!
Nah, nope……
I was day dreaming, while sitting in the dark with eyes open. When I realized this, I also realized, it was my self importance to my rescue. To be honest, in my normal state, I’m usually off in left field picking daisies and daydreaming. In darkroom, I went from seeing energy/puffs, to seeing personal heroics, conquests and world domination, I’m a hero like that. The random and strange, the sorcery was gone (buzzkill). I was for sure fooled for a cple weeks.
When perception really shifts (via inner silence and tensegrity) to the second attention; reality gets a CGI look, like it’s all too real, especially colours and what you perceive is random, strange and usually starts with tint of colour from the puffs. I lost it all and eventually noticed a voice (the me) in my head was full speed motormouth, story teller and Voila! I was day dreaming (buzzkill - again).
*(The above is my interpretation of perception in the second attention, it’s not from the books or any published work).
So, I reset, same schedule and when I find myself consistently losing inner silence over and over - I stop try again tomorrow. Recently puffs are sorta starting to come back, but it seems harder to do now and even harder to hold. Is what it is, I’m rolling with it and not stressing. Tensegrity is enjoyable to me, and my fitness has definitely improved from that. So I progress, or I don’t, is what it is.
If anybody has any advice, wanna share experiences, or call bullshit, I’m here for you.
The posted image is the last one to come in a puff before I got hoodwinked by my self important.
16 Comments
Has anyone had the experience of seeing your own face which materialized out of a purple puff? I've had that several times where I see my own face, like in a mirror and the face I'm seeing is me but with a stoic look and it is me but aged like fine wine. Kind of like the most masculine chad version you could possibly be. The most stunning thing about this is every time I see it it's such a high graphic resolution, that no mirror with perfect lighting could possibly replicate that.
You’re so beautiful that you even admire yourself in the Nagual?
Is that what you getting at?
That’s some next level self importance broskis-brewski 🏆
No, my point was that it was kind of like you saw the exact polar opposite of yours even though physically the person looked the same. Like the best version of yours. What was I supposed to think? "Fuck you, you're ugly!" or what?
If I'm getting this right -the exact polar opposite is the best version, so doesn't that fall under self importance anyway? Like putting your self up..putting your self down.
The dung beetle makes more sense, he only has one thing to carry.
I was joking, have to laugh cause what we trying to do here is next level difficult AF
Yes this happens to me all the time. Without the ‘chad version’ part though, I just look very much like myself.
Be extremely careful about "day dreaming".
I categorize it with Buddhist "visualization" techniques.
It's a death trap.
You're going towards pretending, rather than being silent so that you can see what's actually there, without blocking it with your internal dialogue, and glossing.
Day dreaming is under the control of "Mr. DoubleTake", the enforcer of social restrictions on what you are allowed to perceive.
So daydreaming pursues what you want to see with a vengeance, centered around self-pity, self-flattery, and self-soothing.
All of which drive your energy body away. It wants no part of all that confusion and suffering.
We have a high percentage of new people who never figure this out, and try to make up results for darkroom based on perceiving blue line effects everyone sees anyway.
Like "auras".
I suppose someone who can get silent and perceive what's really there might see glows, but that's not at all the same thing as a hippy attention seeking claim to "see people's auras".
That comes from a combination of religious con artists from various systems, now being exploited by a dishonest person who is too lazy to do any actual work.
They even steal each other's artwork???
I suppose some designers are making business with that, or they’re simply mass-producing them with Chat GPT… I told Chat GPT: “Modify it from the perspective of Olmec sorcery”, and this was the result (at least it ripped out all the words).
"Now book cover that attracts the readers of Carlos Castaneda"
Extremely careful? I’m extremely prejudice with my sessions and sober, so I’m not fooling myself. I was pretty hesitant to write this post. But figured fuck it, this is what I’m doing and here’s where it went sideways on me. It’s a learning opportunity for me for later, I caught myself and hopefully it’ll help others who may stray.
I believe was addressing that commented to people in general; for them to be extremely careful when tracking towards daydreaming.
It’s clear from your post that you were already very aware of that possible hangup.
I was arguing in the theoretical, to emphasize the point to new people who see that, and might get confused.
I pretty much jump on any soapbox that shows up.
Hey man, sorry and sorry Dan u/dan999 - I didn’t mean to take Dan’s reply the wrong and come off as testy, which I kinda did. Maybe I’m a bit sensitive cause sometimes I’m tired of looking retarded. I was pretty hesitant to post about the day dreaming issue.
I appreciate you folks. You’ve given us that “chance to have a chance” with Darkroom and the work it takes to maintain the forum.
I’ve been thinking about editing the post. There’s a couple things I left out. A big one is me being constantly (mostly drug free) zoned out and day dreaming. I’ve been making a serious effort to cut that shit out. I’m hoping it helps; it’s a struggle to not break inner silence when you catch the drift from the puffs into some corny daydream. The other point: recognizing the transition from inner silence into day dreaming. I noted a couple changes but maybe I wasn’t clear enough?
Thanks fellas
Better real processes than imaginary ones! Sometimes I’ve fallen for believing myself to be “Superman,” but the fall only hurts Clark Kent… It’s better to wipe your snot and keep fighting, the path is long!
Maybe there’s a chair at the bottom of the water waiting for you, so that one day you can sit there and watch sea creatures… Or maybe it’s a chair to tie up the one who won’t shut up! I mean: it’s not worth trying to find meaning in visions, but you should make use of your real achievements to motivate yourself and move forward.
You know that while “picking daisies” during the day, you can take in some rays of sun in your eyes, and every second counts… Tensegrity improves your physical condition because it is mobilization of visible energy.
One day someone told me: “If you do good work in D.R., the double comes to dance,” and I thought: “If I do a good dance in D.R., does the double come to work?”
I suppose all our actions in D.R. are “inputs”, and what we “see” or don’t see are the responses to those “inputs.”