Earlier today in Darkroom, I was looking at two different images in each eye. Seemed odd to me, so I closed my right eye and held the puff/cobwebs in my left until my inner dialogue became uncontrollably perplexed by this left/right split.
I’d kinda written it all off as flyer or tonal interference, but got thinking, what I did was weird even for sorcery. I’ve read through alot of the Sub and don’t recall anybody experiencing a similar split?
I’m calling a split cause that what it seemed like. The right image is very William Blake.
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I am going to speculate it’s a result of a lateral shift…
Has anybody ever come here and mentioned a split?
The longer I do this, the deeper my silence gets, the more I think CC wasnt fictionalizing Flyers Mind. Something will trick/distract and lead you astray to maintain the internal dialogue.
I had one experience where I had a split of awareness but I didn't share it here because psilocybin was involved, this was 3 years ago. (For readers especially new ones this is not the way!!! Follow instructions from this sub for real progress!!!).
This is just a similar experience regarding that split of awareness.
Some time after ingesting the mushroom I felt that something else was moving me, I automatically sat down and started doing a left hand movement while silent, after a while the left hand was moving by itself really, then while the left was doing that I started doing a different right hand movement ...after a while that ended up putting me in a semi~sleep state, still awake and aware though.
Two images formed (eyes closed, sorry! ) they were my hands doing everything I was doing the exact same movement but it was heavily focused on the sensation, I was feeling those hands images as well as my own physical ones they were matching each other perfectly.
Something weird happened after, I felt that split of left and right of awareness, I had full separate control of each image (hand). Incredible dexterity. I play guitar but on my everyday day level , I'm not even close!
The images made me dozed off but I was still aware following the movement until I was pulled to those images.
As soon as I felt that pull I opened my eyes and I was floating somewhere flying, everything looked white around me!!! A voice kinda guiding me said, you want it more exciting ?? and when I looked down I had four arms !! I was totally aware of who I was and where I came from of course I panicked, seeing and feeling other 2 limbs coming out of me to make the exercise funnier...
My panicking came also from the raw sensation in perception I was having, so different to my physical body.
I came back immediately I started panicking, almost falling from the position I was in my physical body. My real physical hands were still doing the movements!!!
But I remember clearly the fragmentation of my awareness and being able to influence or follow each one individually at the same time. It's so alien to explain that I apologize for this terrible explanation.
I might get my hand slapped for this, but that’s ok, happens all the time….
MagicMushrooms can help turn off internal dialogue. Well not just help, they do turn it off. Prob don’t need a heroic dose for it, maybe a microdose, but I’m not a scientist, I’m just a joker with arsenal of awkward lol’s and comments….
I don't do them anymore. That's when I found this reddit around 3 years ago.
I’ll still do them from time to time.
Wow, dude, that’s really interesting. I’m not even close to this level of detail, but sometimes during darkroom gazing I get the sense that my eyes have slightly different perceptions. It quickly evens out, though.
You’ll get there, practice everyday and don’t skip, even if you can only do 5min, it matters. If you haven’t, read all the books, they change you.
I go through long periods of lulls, just seeing puffs and I still can’t interact with them, but I don’t stress, it’ll come, it takes years to learn.
How long do you practice every day before you see puffs
Somewhere in the wiki it says 2 weeks to see energy. The puffs are energy. Your energy. It took me longer, like a month or two. Tensegrity is the secret ingredient to inner silence and seeing energy.
No one says it much. Tensegrity and inner silence aka Darkroom rewires you physically and mentally. I see it in the vibrancy of the puffs.
Cheers
Were you crossing your eyes slightly?
I get a similar split when im crossing the eyes basically the left eye is doing the work. I get to observe it in daylight for some reason most often. In the left eye the the imagery was that vivid like the image?
Ya know sometimes I do cross my eyes in DR, but I don’t think I was doing it this time cause I was using mask.
Oh you won’t like this part, it’s an Ai image, so no it wasn’t bright and I don’t edit the images.
Did you see an imagery like this one you showed at least?
You have to observe it, you were probably crossing them slightly to get that effect.
Of course, I wouldn’t have posted something I didn’t see, that’s pretending. I’ve been recapping, so the puffs and cobwebs are brighter/stronger. They’re not Christmas light points of light like the image. The other side is accurate, other than snake dragon could be a bit more horizontal.
When i have strong visuals I feel like my eyes are "holding them ", i feel the weight on my eyes, usually the left eye is doing the work but there are times that my right is also. Do you get those sensations too? Also how old are you? Was the scene static like an image or like a video with movement?
For the last cple weeks, when I’ve gazed post tensegrity, which I’ve been trying to not do, I feel that heavy pass out like feeling, which I think is my AP moving come. Then visually puffs take up all of my vision, a lot bigger and brighter. Some images/scenes not all, have things happening, I was at some dudes house looking at his flooded backyard while he was shovelling snow, but the sensations have felt external like something beside me, where I’ve looked expecting to see a person beside me shovelling nothing there and I’ve blown my session. The other day, I was practicing and for sure thought a chair or “something” was beside me maybe I moved around darkroom enough? nope nothing there, session over.
This one, what got me, was two different images in each eye. So I didn’t keep holding the view, but I didn’t shake my head to brush it away, I closed my right eye, saw the image in my left, opened right, saw the William Blake looking shit, it might’ve changed(?) and then closed my eye right eye again, at which point I was literally asking myself what the fuck is going on here and managed to lose everything. I’m still easily distracted from silence.
Just cause maybe all that is a big word salad, I’ve felt heavy lately like I wanna pass out feeling, but nowhere near passing out, and sensations have been external more of a physical presence beside me. Scenes I’ve been seeing have been active not so much moving. None of this is every practice I’ve had long lulls of faint puffs and strong puffs. Which I’m kinda starting to think are sometimes connected with cobweb? I dunno I’m really guessing, it’s all different right now. That’s a lot more word salad of stuff that’s impossible to explain with detail.
Sounds good to me so far. Don't know what is bad with gazing past tensegrity tho. It's giving you good results and the heaviness is normal you feel, sometimes i feel it with some tensegrity passes. It's what you said, your ap loosening to move. Sometimes when i get that i close eyes and im seeing stuff or seeing like being else instantly sometimes combined with a nausea lol.
Don't worry abt losing silence, you can just calm yourself down and resume.
It’s not bad, I wasn’t implying gazing post tensegrity is bad. I still can’t interact while doing tensegrity everything is happening while gazing after and i want to change that and interact while doing.
I don’t want to sound certain of anything b/c I’m not.
My ability to to hold silence is very easily disrupted by myself, noises around the house. Be nice to acknowledge and still keep my internal dialogue off.
Gazing post tensegrity is perfectly normal it all sounds good to me! Just practice! It took Carlos ten years in a lineage
Actually Taisha's first technique, given out before workshops, involved trying to feel a difference between the left and right side energy.
When I use it, I can see stuff more intensely than feel it.
But you shouldn't assume any one time experience you have needs analyzing.
I've seen intense magic thousands of times now, and one thing you can say with certainty is that it doesn't repeat much.
Sorcery is completely different from anything else out there which claims to be magic, and has "secrets you can uncover".
With sorcery, it's more like "Two billion secrets you can uncover".
Just the "general aspect of it" might repeat, but the specifics are very unlikely to do that.
In fact, don Juan himself said that each time you "see" a thing, it's different.
And that's partly because if you look for what you saw last time, you've just altered the intent of it. And it'll change.
Here's what I was gazing at last night.
"Toy Cave".
I had the idea that maybe Julian could be found in a region of the inorganic being's realm that looked a little like that.
I have no idea why I believed that... Makes no sense.
But it did seem like a terrible place to be trapped.
It was fully stable, for a good 20 minutes.
But the chances of seeing that again tonight, are almost zero.
I forgot about experiences not being repeatable, but do you mean the act of split vision or the scenes I saw aren’t repeatable?
Likely split vision won't repeat, but if it repeats 3 times in a short period of perhaps 2 weeks, then it's worth trying to "figure out".
I have a few posts where one half of the room was normal, and the other was in the second attention.
Not quite "split vision" however, It was reality that was split, right down the middle.
In one, I was actually watching a baby on carpet to my right.
But I couldn't find a picture of that. I have perhaps 800 pictures in my folder. Hopefully I can get an AI to index them in a year or two, with descriptions and keywords.
When I saw the room split in half, it was very likely the result of one of my allies.
Kind of an aside topic. Dark energy. That comes from IOBs, or is it energy that’s loose and floating around, or I guess it could be both?
All we know is that don Juan said we "need" the dark energy of inorganic beings, in order to move our assemblage point the way seers do.
And somewhere it says that women can store it in their wombs.
Plus it shows up all the time. And when it does, it really helps cause magic to manifest.
Otherwise I don't believe we know if there's some "out there" without an ally around.
Yes he did say that; I recently re-read the IOB related chapters.
Now that I’ve thought about it, dark energy is probably not randomly floating around, or DJM/CC likely would’ve mentioned it and used it.
But it does "stick around" us, even males, and then when your energy body comes out and swarms your torso, that seems to feed the dark energy, and it becomes very vivid.
Perhaps the IOBs can feed off our awareness even when they aren't visible, by leaving "dark energy probes" with us.
This pic will bother the Cleargreenies...
My main rationale for posting, was not the image/scene - it was the physical action. When I closed my right eye, it was done without internal dialogue. I didn’t think or talk; telling myself to close my eye, I just did it, action/movement without thought/discussion.
That’s will?
Sorry for bringing this up a day later, I got distracted with the other replies in here….
"The secret is in the left eye," he said. "As a warrior progresses on the path of knowledge his left eye can clasp anything. Usually the left eye of a warrior has a strange appearance; sometimes it becomes permanently crossed, or it becomes smaller than the other, or larger, or different in some way."
He glanced at me and in a joking manner pretended to examine my left eye. He shook his head in mock disapproval and chuckled.
There are plenty of references to the left eye throughout the books as well.
Every time you see a human with a lazy left eye, you have to wonder, sorcerer? lol
This shits hard.
As I told AthinaJ, I was never saying gazing post tensegrity is any way negative. But in an effort to lessen my compulsion to be routine, turning the not-doings into routine doings, and ultimately advance, I’m avoiding gazing post tensegrity. I only have the moment, the here and now to get tensegrity and inner silence working together in DR.
Could be. And there is indeed a sort of tug on the stomach when "will" snaps into place.
But a better description from what I've seen is that there's a "burst of energy" when you recognize the results.
The stomach feeling has been noticeable, but not as nausea, but maybe that’s how women notice it as AthinaJ mentioned? It’s also not nervous butterflies. Ima shut up here cause I don’t have the intensity or consistent repetition to comment further.
In the later books, which is also puzzling, for me, DJM tells CC that will keeps the forces of emanations separated. That’s all I remember cause I made a quick notepad when I read it awhile back.
We are monkeys literally sitting in the dark, doing tensegrity and trying to advance the sensations and perceptions we think we pick up as we interpret them.
Without this sub I’d be so fucking lost….
Last week I was thinking about how we start out by pretending to be silent and I finally understood what you meant and actually knew when I was doing it……..wild!
I suppose I can see how "will" keeps the emanations separated.
Because will selects which ones are allowed to harmonize with your awareness.
And when you get further along, you can "withdraw" that, and watch all hell break loose.
As nothing has meaning anymore, and reality mustates into so much complexity, there's nothing recognizable anymore.
I used to try to suggest trying that to people, but it seems as if the level of silence needed is so great, no one can see how to do it,
Even though at times, it's perfectly obvious.
We were born that way!
Just look at a newborn watching the world around themselves.
They don't focus on anything unless some adult slaps their hands to make a loud noise, to force the baby to look their way.
And do a trick for them.
That's what got us into this mess, of "forcing things to make sense", using "will".
I can’t quite fathom how Will works on Emanations, or what removing it from the emanations looks like.
All humans would are selecting the same emanations and similarly harmonizing our awarenesses to see and confirm the physical world around us?
I believe, the emanations are a fixed sea of infinite lines, but we can't perceive that unless we cease to have ao body in some odd way, and float freely in the emanation ocean.
But as a person, we can see the portions of the emanations inside us.
Just my belief, it's not something carlos or the witches said.
So if you gaze into a dark room and reach the orange zone, or perhaps the deep orange zone, the emenations become visible as fragments in the air.
And if you look at specific ones, and finally reach silent knowledge, you'll "know" what manipulating those with your fingers, can do.
As for "will", if you are viewing a stream of reality but withdraw your attention from it, fully, there's other "choices" of reality streams at precisely that assemblage point.
"Will" selects which of possible thousands you select, at that very specific assemblage point position.
So without moving the assemblage point at all, "will" keeps the emanations separated.
But that's also just my interpretation of what that statement from the books means.
It's not a crazy interpretetion however, because I can do that. Withdraw from the current view of reality, to see how many options there are at that specific assemblage point location.
Doesn't mean I can fully "tune them in".
I suppose a good analogy is driving to Las Vegas from Los Angeles, back in the 70s.
Somewhere in the middle of the desert, there's only one AM station on the radio.
Which changes to another, when you get 50 miles further along the highway.
You can try to tune in the next one before it's strong enough, and if you turn the knob, it's obvious there's another station near the one that's strong.
But you can't "tune it in" yet.
I appreciate that input. I’m the books we’re told there’s emanations but the interaction detail is light. Not that it’s an issue mind you, but we are in a different time, so hearing from someone who’s seen and interacted with them and passing the experience along is knowledge for when I or others encounter them. We have reference.
I think I’m grasping “will” and maybe mildly experiencing it. DJM has a cple of definitions and explanations for will in the books. It’s easy to confuse it with intent as well. If I explained Will as; in the absence of the internal dialogue giving commands, WILL is what sorcery uses to take action - would you agree with that?
I'm more leaning towards will being what finally makes a reality snap into full view, in a stable fashion.
You can't take action, until there's a reality in which to act.
I think I understand this, but it’s also complex.
I’ve been watching the Star Wars Fan Films, some are really good eh.
I've felt the tug in the belly in ensuenio.
It's not a nervous butterfly feeling, maybe in the physical body bringing the double? I don't know...
but in the double it feels literally like energy pulling or bursting from the belly it is a unique feeling, I've felt it backwards and to the front it has a unique sensation on its own. You'll know it without a doubt when you' ve experienced it, you won't wonder. It does feel like tentacles moving, kinda uncomfortable, but maybe that is because it was new to me.
You can literally feel with them and get sensations, information through them, maybe that is because that is guiding your attention/awareness, it feels like an extension of your body. I don't know if they are actual tenctacles, but there is a feeling coming from the belly that could match tentacles moving, at least for the tonals reasoning. Very strange!
I was studying this last night, after achieving continuous seeing for hours.
"Will" is a vast category involving recognition, tentacles that come from the body, motivations, goals, other beings, and too many things to list them all.
We try to turn it into a single thing, the way Daoism seems to do.
When badly translated for westerners.
And this subreddit even comes under attack from "chinese sage" types who think they can trick people into believing they have a way to understand "will", using ancient chinese wisdom.
But will is VAST, VAST, VAST.
Far beyond what any Chinese sage even dared to fantasize about.
Just as seeing is vast. And dreaming.
And the tonal.
So trying to fit it into the category of a technique you can master in a reasonable amount of time, is a completely misunderstanding of it. And sorcery too.
It might be possible to realize how complex Will is, by seeing that it has direct connection to both the tonal (your daily world), and the Nagual (the second attention) in that 8 point diagram.
In the first few books, CC uses “will” to move while under influence of psychedelics. Then in later books we learn that Will works on the emanations, and as you’ve further expanded.
For me, being new and trying to interact while doing DR tensegrity, I need to use my will, not my internal dialogue to interact/move.
I don’t think you’re implying that I’m trying simplify and master it(?) you’re explaining how the ChiComm stuff corrupts and misleads.
I'm not even sure what we read about the Chinese explaining "will" is even translated well enough for us to know what it was trying to say.
You pretty much have to have grown up in a Chinese country, to understand Chinese writings.
In AI speak, it's a highly "Zero Anaphora" language.
Japanese is said to be worse, except that in Chinese the motivation for assuming much of a sentence can be assumed without actually mentioning it, being "properness".
And in Japanese it's "politeness".
Both case untold problems when western engineers try to get things done in Asian factories which tinker with engineering, but need outside help.
As usual, Russia is somewhere in the middle between Asia, and European points of view.
Ima stick with Matus, Castaneda and Lawton explanations of “Will” they’ve got me fascinated and glimpsing the indescribable.
I’ve been thinking through the diagram and my eureka moment came when i re-read your reply that “Will is vast.” Will doesn’t just act on the emanations, it also acts on all points of a human being. It’s the action mechanism, for the human in either awareness.
This brought back a memory from early childhood where I would defocus and look at the shadows in the hallway till I found some weirdness and then I would scoot down the hallway and start playing with what I found with my hands.
This was in the evening, probably while my parents were making dinner, and not at night.
Maybe everyone used to do "impossible things" as children?