Hello + some thoughts

Hello I've been lurking around here for a while and had some thoughts about some things. I would like to see what everyone has to say about it.

About me: I'm a lady practitioner who has been practicing since December, can get fog in dark room, trance energy while drawing, and is avidly interested in this.

One caveat: I have not read all the books so forgive me if I get some stuff wrong, but I get the jist of what is going on. I've been on a quest for magic through alchemy, magic systems, religion, etc. and almost landed on buddhism because of how magically promising meditation sounded but was disappointed the extent of mastery just included good feelings. I can jerk off for that lol. I am super excited to have found this community (through the prison planet subreddit, boy do they love the flyer excerpt and ignore every other thing the books have to offer lol), as it seems to combine Chinese internal alchemy, movement, gender differences, actual visible magic, actual useful reality things, just all the good stuff everything else has been alluding to but not following up on.

My practice

I do my own tensegrity stuff with fascia release (the shake and vibration you get from doing some forms of stretching, as I believe this is freeing bound energy from your physical body and is probably an important component of getting your energy double formed.) The research brought on from The Body Keeps The Score gave me this idea as emotional trauma can be physically released from the body by vocalizing and stretching. I get bored in dark room (I have that inattentive adhd curse) but I try and go in there and silence my mind and get the fog at this point. I can do about an hour before I get too bored and give up. I will be trying to do more yin yoga type fascia release in dark room and see if it makes a noticeable difference. I will explain more about why I think this is important versus doing some of the other tensegrity moves

I also have been experimenting with intuitive movements during dark room to see if I can scrunge up some energy in a way that is more engaging for me (I get bored lol) and was thinking that maybe the tensegrity strengthens your mind muscle connection for your dreaming double to know how to move physically. In my dreams it feels very non physical, and I wonder if one had built up enough muscle memory of how you go about walking, or running, it would be easier to get your dreaming self to do so, and vice versa for the mental imaging stalking, imagining impossible movements so you can bring it into the physical world.

I am an artist and sometimes try and silence my mind and find the image in the art. I posted some of my more successful attempts. They are always 100x better than if I try and force something out. I also recently had a bad drug trip that lead to my hospitalization and paranoid delusions ala schizo style, but I got some very interesting imagery to show up in my head. This is also included (they are the imagery at the end.) I have not tried stalking method for art though yet.

Some thoughts about the nature of how the books were written, and the usefulness of stalking:

Carlos after being brought into the tradition of sorcery went on to write the main series of books. I would like to say he was, in a way "divinely inspired by intent" to do so to fill a missing niche in the annals of content in humanity. This is why none of the other content is accurate except for what's included on the reading list for this sub.

I find it very interesting that Taisha in her books describes stalking as using your minds eye to act out certain things, and that this is what leads to flying and "impossible" actions. I have been trying this while also imagining my mind-muscle connection (exercise terminology, quick search on the internet describes it as "The mind-muscle connection is all about concentrating on muscle contraction and stretching when working out") for doing tensegrity moves. Taisha used this stalking technique for other things as well, such as her essays or her dress, or clothes. I believe this points to the fact that you can use your mind (must have some sort of connection to the energy double...) to begin something you want to do, and then intent intuitively guides you the rest of the way to the answer, or bends reality in a way to make this possible because it was possible in your mind.

Final thoughts:

I wonder if you need to seduce intent (and thus your energy double) into inspiring you ala muse style into succeeding into anything you try and put your mind to while in a semi trance state (silent and open) and this is a lite version of silent knowledge.

But why would one want to do that? One might be monetarily driven, or passion driven. I wonder if using this energy to do passion projects, such as what Carlos did, uses up your energy in a way that doesn't let you physically go, or if it's the other way, that you need to be using this energy in a "creatively, master work type of project" to increase your power. If it's a necessity to advance to more intense reality bending powers. Sort of like how exercising and using your energy in the gym actually gives you more power and energy throughout the day.

Who knows for sure though, but I'll be doing more weird shit to try and expand my practice, as well as reading more of the books to see what else can be gleamed. I'm excited to get some fucking puffs in dark room one day lol.

Thanks for reading and I look forward to everyone's thoughts or roasts or both 🙂‍↕️