Well, since a few years I have been isolating myself from people for whatever reason, and honestly, I'm in the point where I don0t care at all, most of people is weird, negative, aggressive, etc. So it was some kind of evolution of myself considering that most of my life I wanted desperately the approval and attention of other people. It's still weird, but I mean, that's normal when you're practicing this right?
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Just sounds like normal aging to me.
You have to be careful not to mistake normal aging for sorcery progress.
Amy (Ellis) had some religious beliefs I never understood, but it caused Carlos to give lectures on catholic topics, for Amy's benefit.
One funny story was about Saint Jerome, who advised celebacy.
And while the AI says it's not accurate, Carlos made the point that it's easy for an old man to advocate celebacy, but just try that at 24 years old!
Don't mistake the wisdom that comes from normal aging, for an achievement.
Sorcery progress is towards the unfathomable!
Not towards ordinary "Buddhist detachment".
Or the "Peace of knowing the love of Jesus".
Those are either unrelated to sorcery, or even irrelevant to sorcerers.
I'm not sure which. Cholita is catholic. She takes it very seriously.
We've even gone looking for a church for her to attend, near our home.
Same way La Gorda seems to have been a catholic, in the books.
But it's as if that's just an ice cream flavor choice to Cholita. We've gone looking for ice cream too.
As far as sorcery recommends you should live the best "normal life" you can, an "impeccable" one even.
Not changing anything you were born into, believing that will help you learn sorcery.
You should try to be a "Perfect Tonal". No time for any of that sorcery nonsense.
Then when practicing sorcery, abandon the tonal and embrace the Nagual.
Which becomes fully visible! Last night all I had to do was get into my practice room, look up, and I saw this.
The Nagual.
I always get to see it, but usually it takes hours of work to move my assemblage point that far. 14 feet minimum to see stuff like this.
By contrast, meditation or prayer only move it 6 inches. And only for a very few of their followers.
In our normal life, I suggest it's best not to alter anything on purpose unless it's something you discover by observing what gives you more magic, or less magic.
If a daily activity makes it take 3 hours to see what you see above, try to do less of that.
If a daily activity makes that show up in seconds, do A LOT MORE OF THAT!!!!
Except in my case, it was contact with Cholita that made it take only seconds to reach HA. Wasn't anything I'd figured out to do.
Don't try to bend yourself into some kind of "good church follower" type. Don't make a list of things to deny yourself, and don't assume sorcery is going to fix everything some day.
You don't get out of living your life just because you joined a new church!
People do that sort of thing because they aren't willing to do the actual work of learning to stop their internal dialogue.
And no, there's no reason you need to isolate yourself, based on sorcery.
In fact, over time it ought to make you into a better person as far as getting along with others. You stop having ugly ulterior motivations for how you deal with people. And come to realize that if you wrong someone else, you've incurred a debt.
Their obsessions no longer seem important to you, so they're easier to tolerate.
Carlos and the witches took paying back debts very seriously!
Something you come to understand, while trying to stream silent knowledge smoothly.
So the answer is, it's just you...
Might be others like you too, also practicing sorcery.
But it's not inevitable or even "normal" on this path.
The opposite might happen!
Either way it's not a problem.
We ALL suck big time, without exception.
Sorcery is the only way to fix that.
If you actually work hard, "you" ceases to exist (temporarily) once your assemblage point makes it to the orange zone.
And after washing yourself in "not you" daily, you begin to feel ashamed for your past behavior.
Of course, the recapitulation is what's designed to answer your question directly.
"In fact, over time it ought to make you into a better person as far as getting along with others. You stop having ugly ulterior motivations for how you deal with people. And come to realize that if you wrong someone else, you've incurred a debt."
That's very close to me. I came to this understanding gradually and now I don't just tolerate, but avoid quarrels, conflicts, promises and the like. Otherwise, a debt or some kind of gestalt is formed, which arouses an internal dialogue and prevents practice.
I suppose it IS part of stalking.
Darkroom also is 80% "stalking".
But beginners can't see that, so it doesn't come up much.
All they see is the lineage senior members making a fool out of Carlos by wearing costumes.
So they confuse stalking with lording it over other people, something most in our community greatly crave. Social status, "superiority" and human attention.
When in fact Stalking is about using behavior to hold new positions of the assemblage point. Or even to move the assemblage point further along the J curve, and especially horizontally.
It's rule #2 of darkroom! Call it the "stalking rule". Rule #1 says to look for things that "can't possibly be there" and focus on them in silence. That moves the assemblage point along the J curve, hopefully down the middle to make it faster.
But Rule #2 says to treat the sights of darkroom as real. That moves the assemblage point horizontally, and once in a while lets you break the laws of physics. It also stabilizes that new depth, such as the deep red zone.
But those "debts" begin to weigh heavy on your mind when you can daily view Silent Knowledge, and realize what it takes to "clean your link to intent".
If you can clean your link, you get what you see on the left in this picture. If it's dirty, you get what you see on the right.
I find it fascinating that AI drawing programs start from what you see on the right. Random static. Then the Ai just "predicts" how to change all the random noise, to make it more like the requested picture.
The same happens when you can stream silent knowledge, EXCEPT that you have no input prompt. You aren't trying to turn the random noise into any specific image.
So that what directs it, is energy itself. Energy as it flows in the universe.
As you age, it becomes impossible to pay back some of those "debts" because the people involved are dead.
Might be one reason don Juan suggested donating to the account of man. Such as when he advised Carlos to give money to 2 young men they ran into. He explained:
"If a warrior wants to pay back for all the favors they have received, and they have no one in particular to address their payment to, they can address it to the spirit of man. That's always a very small account, and whatever one puts in it is more than enough."
I completely agree! The pictures accurately reflect the dependence of the quality of the observed plot in the air on the purity of intention, which is purer the fewer “debts” there are. And when we understand this, we avoid collecting debts in any form. I think there’s a similar connection with sex, but so far I haven’t been able to define it precisely
Carlos told us in private class to be celibate back around 1995, so I have been since then.
I'm pretty sure everyone else in private class ignored it, but I had a theory that if you did what Carlos asked, he then had a "debt" to me to do what he could to help my learn sorcery.
Even past death.
Whether it's true or not, I suppose doesn't really matter.
What about people that end up in power? either on the spotlight or behind ? Surely must be other kinds of magic lurking. Why not to use this magic for improving things here?
No one is so talented that they can make it all the way, if they get involved in that sort of thing.
I suppose I can go back to my analogy of learning a difficult physical activity.
Like gymnastics.
If you stop learning to help others learn, you'll never reach a competitive level where you can compete.
You might help people be mediocre like you are, but you have to spend all of your time, to master something that difficult.
Multiply that by 10 for sorcery.
So the problem is, no one can do what you say, and actually learn it.
Plus it's an attention seeking activity, which dirties your link to intent. Likely causing infinity not to give you the rewards needed to move your assemblage point the entire length of the J curve.
If you are sincere, infinity will still reward you.
But not with sorcery demonstrations.
It'll give you what you seek, which is better insights for helping others learn to be mediocre gymnasts.
Hopefully you haven't been polluted with Sufism.
We got people suggesting we should use sorcery to "help others" a couple of times, from people brainwashed by that fake magical system.
And no, there's no other magic lurking out there.
I looked for 15 or 20 years, flying all over the world.
Carlos was famous and could go meet anyone, even the top of the line famous Gurus.
Never found any real magic.
Learn some, and you'll come to understand why.
But in the meantime, there's the internet now.
Point to something you think is real and let's take a look.
No one has ever been able to do that, once they realize the standards it has to live up to.
Namely, a community like this one, where there's no denying people are actually learning.
There's certainly no subreddits with anything real.
I've gotten kicked out of many of them for suggesting there ought to be real magic going on.
The fact that they kicked me out proves they don't have any.
Anyone who's seen real magic, would love to hear that there's even better magic available for free.
It's the ones who are pretending who get angry.
Attention seeking in wanting attention ? Or pulling external attention ala Carlos? No I'm not talking about teaching, I'm talking about enough power to affect reality. Not talking about idiotic gurus, I'm talking about secret societies, orders, hidden as Don Juan's lineage was. You assume many things Dan.
But let's push on this. Your whole argument rests on one premise: that "real magic" only exists in the single form you tested spectacle seeking, publicly demonstrable, verifiable by outsiders. If it fails that test, it doesn't exist.
But look at who actually ends up with power, in the spotlight or behind it. Are we really supposed to believe that's all mundane leverage? money, timing, networks, ordinary skill? Because history says otherwise: elites across centuries have consistently gravitated toward exactly this kind of hidden, initiatory, cosmology bound structure. Carlos himself talked about Saturnian cults. That's not nothing I think, that's a pattern going back a very long time, among people who had every resource in the world to chase whatever actually worked and discard whatever didn't.
So here's the real question: if there's nothing there, why does power keep re-inventing this same shape, generation after generation, at the top? Either it's pure coincidence/social technology , the ritual and secrecy are doing loyalty binding work, not metaphysical work, and elites keep using it because it functions regardless of truth-value, or something real does ride inside those structures, but it's a different species of "real" than what you went looking for in your 15-20 years: not perceptual/personal "freedom" work like all Asian bullshit , but something usable on others, which is exactly the kind of magic your framework says would damage progress of whoever tried to wield it for good.
Either way, that's not the same claim as "no other magic is out there." It's a claim that if it exists, it's the kind aimed at influence rather than freedom that's what I'm talking about, and by your own logic, that's the one kind you'd never be able to find by looking for it honestly, because you're not the audience it's built to serve. Quite the contrary.
So: is your position that ritual is pure social glue, no exceptions ever or do you grant that something real, aimed outward rather than inward, is a live possibility you just haven't personally verified? This people might have other methods to have contact with inorganics. Probably the flyers themselves.
I’m not a people person. I mostly avoid people and crowds. Darkroom however, has expanded my view of the world, self and others. It’s a net positive whether I get anywhere with it or not…
You shoud get a dog! I love dogs. Much better companions than most ppl. I love dogs…
But it's funny, because I don't have any problem interacting with people. Just I prefer lonelyness.