Started reading Castaneda in 1975. I was very young then and because of my experience with power plants, I had an strong bond with these experiences. Long walks were common and stopping my internal dialogue was necessary. But when I learned the silence and gait methods, I could see the lines of the earth. I remember the days of my youth as if it were yesterday but the world has made me weary and I can no longer see the universe. I am old now and I long for the feeling of oneness. Makes me sad. I wish I had a companion (anyone) to share my thoughts and experiences back then. Perhaps when I take the leap I can at least see this once more. The Eagle awaits me.
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You took the books to heart and actually applied them to your life. You're one-up on a percentage of those who've read or were interested in Castaneda's work:
Ian Dunbar https://www.reddit.com/r/castaneda/comments/c8h3qs/ian_dunbar_dont_wind_up_like_this_guy/
There are far sadder life stories out there. Don't forget, if you commit 100% you can get to a better position in far less time than you fear you have left.
The Buddha did it in 2 weeks (any Buddhists to correct this?)
Unbending Intent is THE true miracle.
It was overnight! But after years of striving of course. He recalled an experience in his youth in which he'd spontaneously entered the first jhana, and realising for himself it was the path to awakening, he just went with it.
If you can find that pleasure free of sensuality and unskillful mental qualities, and then stick with it assiduously, it should be pretty quick. The Buddha had thoroughly prepared himself though, had an unbending intent beyond the majority of us. And honestly we're pretty married to sensuality and the petty mind.
The Tibetan Book of the Dead says the moment at which enlightenment is most accessible for most of us is just after our deaths, if we can remain somewhat aware. It also likens this intermediate state to the state between waking and dreaming, and if we can remain somewhat aware during this too we can train ourselves for the moment of our deaths. Sound familiar?
Curse those Buddhists!!!!
How's a Stormtrooper to take pride in his accomplishments, if Buddhists already did that thousands of years ago?
Thanks you for your kind words. I know that throughout history there have been initiates who surpassed their teachers. Don Juan’ pupil Elias (think that was his name) comes to mind. He took to leap of faith literally; into the second attention and transcended. Sadly I am more like Carlos. I have to work harder. Again thanks. Good to talk about this with someone after all these years.
From what I've been reading on the Mystical Qabalah lately, it's been said that even if you don't reach the final goal of enlightenment (which as Don Juan said, is only graduating into the unkowable realm, still much more to learn after that). Any progress you make in this life will be carried over into the next life. So nothing is lost, and it's not too late to make your best effort going forward!
Also, any time I find myself feeling sad for too long I remind myself of what Don Juan would say "You're indulging".
I did this so well for many years, that I then realized, I no longer was able to feel many things deeply, as I wouldn't allow myself too.
So I've updated it, I think it's important to connect and process such feelings, but also, remind myself after a while to stop indulging my self-pity.
I'm new to this sub Reddit, but let's do it! No time like the present.
User name checks out.
Added an “e” to Matus, so no one will confuse
Get yourself into heightened awareness. That's what you want to see.
Last night I was trying out a new technique shown to me by a witch trained by Carlos.
The darned technique worked! It was a witches' modification of a standard form.
I was fully in heightened awareness. Magic was everywhere. I was watching a dreaming scene, a man was trying to leave. I used that technique, and it froze him.
It's really fun. And you get to keep the feeling the next day.
If you're old, you'll need plenty of sleep to pull it off.
Would love to hear more about it
There's a new post about it.
Heightened awareness is where you have moved your assemblage point far into the interior, and you just "know" whatever you want to know. Or how to do it, is more correct.
You're also in complete bliss, and your breathing becomes automatic, and only the stomach moves.
The world feels silent. Anything you might worry about seems silly.
YOU can get there. Go read my "Simple Silence Technique". Learn what the second attention looks like, and what moving the assemblage point feels like.
Then gaze in darkness, finding colors.
It's possible to reach heightened awareness in only a few weeks, with lots of cool stuff happening in the meantime.
But people have a hard time getting serious. I guess it's the people around them. Family, friends, obligations.
Carlos made me celibate, which seems to have taken care of the Family part.
Seems like a psychostimulant experience, like a cocaine or amphetamine. I have never tried it, but the guy who did described it to me this way.
It's all using the same body. Power plant or not, that's just how our body works, and what it can do.
The mistake is to think there's this thing over here, for example Zen, that's intrinsically different from an acid trip.
Or that this particular form of meditation is much better than the others.
Of that having a dream uses a different thing inside us, than our view of the real world.
That's how they de-clawed us. They created all these false ideas about what's good, and what's not so good, and what sends you to hell.
They separated all the pieces, and made us angry about them, in order to remove our sight of the "big picture".
I'm afraid to say, Buddhism does that too.
I've gotten "you'll go to hell" out of some Buddhists, who heard what I do. First they deny it's possible, then if you show them Buddhist texts, they come up with the next reason. You'll go to hell.
If you found texts saying you won't go to hell, they'll come up with the ultimate brush off.
"Why would you want to do that?"
Excuse me? Why would you want to be Merlin the Magician?
Give me a break.
I'd expect all that from a catholic, but it's a tragedy the kinds of explanations the Buddhists have adopted.
They had it all, but they've been selling off pieces for thousands of years.
I'd rant about Daoists, but they're just plain nuts. They threw away what they had, in exchange for cash.
Hindus also are just plain nuts, but ultimately they seem to be the most willing to explore.
Basically I see it like this. Someone is way up on an ultra long extension ladder they started to climb long ago (be it Buddhism, Hinduism, or Daoism). Maybe they didn't even choose to climb it, but just found themselves on it due to their upbringing.
They're way up it and can see that ahead there are a bunch of missing rungs that have been removed, and no visible way to get past. To admit that they may have been on the wrong ladder, or that it has been tampered with, would make them look foolish and increase their already heightened anxiety at being in such a precarious position.
And it's too far to go back down, and they can't quite reach over and grab the next parallel ladder. What a place to be!
So they wait to see if miraculously the rungs will be replaced, trusting in an original architect...who no longer has maintenance access. Shouting "I'm alright! It's me not the ladder!" to hopefully bolster their position.
I've seen that for sure.
I had a friend die of it.
And my brother got tricked into Zen. I've tried to have even a tiny talk about it, suggesting maybe he should switch.
But Zen is all about hazing and brainwashing students, so that they have a view that Zen is exclusive, and outside Zen no one can understand it.
It's a bad cult royal! Doesn't matter that some of them reach enlightenment. There's plenty of enlightened bastards.
And his Zen master, who was certified, has in fact gone back to being an obvious bastard.
Nothing is permanent! Certainly not enlightenment. True, you can keep going as the Buddhists in here have pointed out, and maybe go so far, it's permanent for all practical considerations.
But the bottom level, the "Zen", is absolutely not permanent. And never will be, because they shun anything beyond that initial realization.
My brother's conclusion: If his Zen master went back to being a fussy idiot, then no one can change themselves.
I tried telling him, who wants to change? I can't even imagine where he got that idea. The Zen master perhaps?
You just need a little magic in your life. Something to look forward to. No need to change.
Be a stormtrooper!
He said no one needs magic (meaning it doesn't exist), while he popped his anti-depressant pills.
It's pretty hard to need anti-depressants, with a little fairy flying around your bedroom suggesting portals to other worlds you might want to visit.
And if you need cheering up, the inorganics are happy to take any shape you like.
Haha, well said!
What is the quickest and the most efficient way to reach it?
Silence in chair until you understand second attention and assemblage point, and how long you can go between words.
Then gaze in darkness until you find colors.
And in silence, play with them. Don't try to get "something" to happen.
Just play with the colors.
If you see a hypnogogic image, that's different. Play with that, to get it to be more real.
But in the end, it just plain takes around 3 hours, to shift the assemblage point that far.
And if you're thinking most of that time, you'll never make it.
That's why the colors are good. It's feedback for whether you really do have silence. You can't fake that or flatter yourself.
Halfway to heightened awareness is a "fussy" state. Don't get discouraged at the halfway point, when you feel like not enough is happening. Or that what's happening is the same old thing, and boring.
You can get lazy and that becomes the default. For instance, Cholita tires me out, and I only do 1.5 hours.
I quickly forget what 3 hours feels like, and begin to fret.
As far as I know, boredom in heightened awareness is impossible. So if you're fretting, you're not as far into it as you believe.
I will check it out Dani. Btw I have heard your name before in the circle. Pleased to hear from you.
Thanks for the reminder. Time for a new start. I have been focusing on “stopping the world” more in the last few days. I am more curious about the practicing that Danixx was talking about and his relationship with Cholita. I have always been pragmatic about the Warriors path but when I see that people are still keeping this way of life alive; it makes me happy. I want the second attention and have been practicing gazing more.
Say to your old age and fatigue: "Go fuck!" . Do not play with them, do not give up. Stop watching your aging, watch the beauty, go for a miracle, admiration, silence and joy. Stop indulging in your tiredness.