I don't think anyone here is qualified to give advice on how this will affect your psychosis. Given that darkroom gazing relies on moving the AP and entering altered states of consciousness, there is a reasonable chance it might.
Being dispassionate about the things you come across helps, but I know that that's distinctly not something you have control over during a psychotic episode.
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u/DiligentMeaning5649
4 points2022-01-09 08:19
What exactly are the symptoms of your psychosis? How is it different on/off meds? What do you think caused it originally?
What you call madness might simply be perceptions you have no framework for. My cousin went through the same thing- gifted, as if he was right there in the second attention all the time, which I verified when I was with him in person. Unfortunately they put him on meds and shut down the talent. What a shame.
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u/jackieaqui
1 points2022-01-10 16:56
Symptoms when I'm off meds or not on the right dosage: visual hallucinations of bugs, insects, and small animals. Feeling like I can telepathically connect to others and start noticing tons of synchronicities. Very rarely have I heard "voices," and when I did they were unintelligible. There's also "negative symptoms" which is the bulk of my illness, basically a loss of all motivation, pleasure, and will to do anything. If I'm manic I am extremely irritable and talk fast and get very little sleep.
I've experienced second attention, at least I think I have, (I've seen symbols and text with my eyes open, and it looked different from the animal hallucinations) and what I experience in second attention is distinct from what goes on in the psychotic process imo. That being said, the methods used to get to second attention may exacerbate psychosis.
[-]
u/DiligentMeaning5649
2 points2022-01-11 01:26
Hmm okay.
So I will give my personal opinion on this matter, then share some examples/experiences, and then finally, tie it back together with your original question in a way that is in line with the 'intent' of this sub.
The recent trend in modern medicine has been to label absolutely everything about the human experience a disease, disorder, condition or syndrome. And they do this for one reason alone- money. Drugs can be patented to treat specific 'syndromes' and they make a killing for each new syndrome they invent. If someone is sad, they call it 'depression' and sell them drugs. If someone is happy, they call it 'mania' and sell them drugs. If someone is horny, they call it 'persistent genital arousal disorder' and sell them drugs. I could go on for weeks...
I was a kid when the "ADD" scam was first introduced (attention deficit disorder- now rebranded ADHD). The kids being diagnosed with this new 'disorder' were totally normal. Class was boring, teachers were boring, school was boring and they had no desire to learn. If anything, they were amped up on sugar. But the billions of dollars big pharma made pushing this narrative of a new 'disorder' was apparently more compelling than common sense. Doctors made huge kickbacks, parents lapped it up, teachers enjoyed their new well behaved zombie children. Now it seems this is par for the course and kids can't just be hyper or get bored anymore without it being some kind of medical disorder.
Basically- the overwhelming majority of maladies that humans experience have a simple physical or non-physical cause and can be resolved without any drugs or medication whatsoever. In fact, the drugs make things worse and create new problems worse than the original issues to begin with.
Example: I once lived in a house with an older woman as a caretaker for her property. As we were roommates we naturally spent a lot of time around each other conversing and doing things like sharing meals.
One evening I was alone in the house and hear a bunch of commotion off in the distance. It was quite lively. There was lots of excited talking, clanging wine glasses and bottles, and music being played and it was coming from the direction down the street. Ah, the neighbors were having a party! What a nice lively party, and how comforting to hear the distance clamor of human socialization.
The horrifying realization suddenly dawned on me that I had no neighbors down the street. I was hearing a phantom ghost party taking place and it creeped me the fuck out.
Now suppose I was a normal person and reported this to my doctor. He would send me to a psych ward and I would be prescribed an anti-psychotic medication, possibly a diagnosis similar to yours. I would be carefully monitored to the point where if I said anything suspicious I could be locked up and force fed drugs for months, even years... I would go on for years telling everyone I had such and such disorder and so on and so forth.
Fortunately I was well versed in these affairs and simply ordered whatever invading energy/presence was encroaching on me out of my space. It was solved in 10 seconds.
Later on the old lady comes home and I find that she had been heavily drinking that night. Instantly I knew that the psychic encroachment that occurred was alcohol energy; due to my entanglement with her and the engagement with the 'spirits' of alcohol and the mind altering effects that brings about, it was as if I was intoxicated and had the same aura opening as if I had been drinking myself. I did a simple intention to unentangle with her and never experienced such a thing again while living there.
Now, to tie this all back to your question. So long as you maintain the disposition that you actually have a medical disorder or such and that you 'need' drugs to deal with it, I do not recommend further pursuing anything on the psychic or spiritual domain. It will not end well. Because, what is causing your maladies are already non-physical in origin. Developing capabilities that further enhance your attunement to the non-physical would simply amplify what you call a negative symptom.
If I were in your situation, I would go off medication, then embark on a path of seriously reconnecting with my body and the earth and removing all foreign interferences. Don Juan and the sorcerors used to actually bury their apprentices in the earth for up to 9 days when they had interference from inorganic beings. That being said, this is what I would do, and I cannot speak for you or recommend you do anything because ultimately you are the one steering your ship.
Best of luck!
[-]
u/jackieaqui
1 points2022-01-11 01:34
Thank you.
[-]
u/DiligentMeaning5649
2 points2022-01-11 01:44
Np
Oh, and one thing I forgot to mention; the energy body or double has even less sobriety than the physical person. So, whatever you are experiencing could be exacerbated if you awaken your energy body.
It's like a genie in a bottle and nearly impossible to put back. I awakened mine prematurely and mine is still attuning to all kinds of crazy energies in the second attention to the point I would call it 'schizophrenic'. I've spent years trying to discipline it and take control of it.
[-]
u/TechnoMagical_Intent
13 points2022-01-09 12:21
Anybody who is not in a directly similar situation to you, or who doesn’t have a background in psycho-pharmacology, is not qualified to give advise on this.
There are some people who’ve passed through here in the past few years who had mental illness issues. What was most apparent was that they had talent, but also great difficulty growing that talent into a reliable and functional skillset, because their episodes would usually derail their progress.
Whether that can be attributed to not being on the right meds, shitty living situations, or having buried trauma that hasn’t been addressed thru recapitulating…
I’d like to think that if someone is on the right meds and their non-optimal neurochemistry is closer to baseline, that they are then on more or less equal footing with everyone else. In which case their looser assemblage point is a decided advantage , and it all boils down to discipline and repetitive work on silencing the inner monologue, which is hell for everyone (inner silence is itself the best of medicines).
[-]
u/jackieaqui
1 points2022-01-10 16:50
Thank you for the input.
[-]
u/HeiruRe777
4 points2022-01-09 14:24
Thank you for sharing your journey, I pray you find the answer you need.
[-]
u/monkeyguy999
5 points2022-01-09 23:07
In my exp. Interacting with the bad element exacerbates problems you may have. Its more energy for them to feed on.
Silence would be rather good for you. Turn off the constant input.
Additionally examine all thought as they come up.
Thinking of an orange? where did that come from. see an orange? see an orange tree? see a juice box in the grocery store? ....etc with practice you can isolate what is from you and what is not from you. And can ignore or blank out the input not of your making.
10 Comments
I don't think anyone here is qualified to give advice on how this will affect your psychosis. Given that darkroom gazing relies on moving the AP and entering altered states of consciousness, there is a reasonable chance it might.
Being dispassionate about the things you come across helps, but I know that that's distinctly not something you have control over during a psychotic episode.
What exactly are the symptoms of your psychosis? How is it different on/off meds? What do you think caused it originally?
What you call madness might simply be perceptions you have no framework for. My cousin went through the same thing- gifted, as if he was right there in the second attention all the time, which I verified when I was with him in person. Unfortunately they put him on meds and shut down the talent. What a shame.
Symptoms when I'm off meds or not on the right dosage: visual hallucinations of bugs, insects, and small animals. Feeling like I can telepathically connect to others and start noticing tons of synchronicities. Very rarely have I heard "voices," and when I did they were unintelligible. There's also "negative symptoms" which is the bulk of my illness, basically a loss of all motivation, pleasure, and will to do anything. If I'm manic I am extremely irritable and talk fast and get very little sleep.
I've experienced second attention, at least I think I have, (I've seen symbols and text with my eyes open, and it looked different from the animal hallucinations) and what I experience in second attention is distinct from what goes on in the psychotic process imo. That being said, the methods used to get to second attention may exacerbate psychosis.
Hmm okay.
So I will give my personal opinion on this matter, then share some examples/experiences, and then finally, tie it back together with your original question in a way that is in line with the 'intent' of this sub.
The recent trend in modern medicine has been to label absolutely everything about the human experience a disease, disorder, condition or syndrome. And they do this for one reason alone- money. Drugs can be patented to treat specific 'syndromes' and they make a killing for each new syndrome they invent. If someone is sad, they call it 'depression' and sell them drugs. If someone is happy, they call it 'mania' and sell them drugs. If someone is horny, they call it 'persistent genital arousal disorder' and sell them drugs. I could go on for weeks...
I was a kid when the "ADD" scam was first introduced (attention deficit disorder- now rebranded ADHD). The kids being diagnosed with this new 'disorder' were totally normal. Class was boring, teachers were boring, school was boring and they had no desire to learn. If anything, they were amped up on sugar. But the billions of dollars big pharma made pushing this narrative of a new 'disorder' was apparently more compelling than common sense. Doctors made huge kickbacks, parents lapped it up, teachers enjoyed their new well behaved zombie children. Now it seems this is par for the course and kids can't just be hyper or get bored anymore without it being some kind of medical disorder.
Basically- the overwhelming majority of maladies that humans experience have a simple physical or non-physical cause and can be resolved without any drugs or medication whatsoever. In fact, the drugs make things worse and create new problems worse than the original issues to begin with.
Example: I once lived in a house with an older woman as a caretaker for her property. As we were roommates we naturally spent a lot of time around each other conversing and doing things like sharing meals.
One evening I was alone in the house and hear a bunch of commotion off in the distance. It was quite lively. There was lots of excited talking, clanging wine glasses and bottles, and music being played and it was coming from the direction down the street. Ah, the neighbors were having a party! What a nice lively party, and how comforting to hear the distance clamor of human socialization.
The horrifying realization suddenly dawned on me that I had no neighbors down the street. I was hearing a phantom ghost party taking place and it creeped me the fuck out.
Now suppose I was a normal person and reported this to my doctor. He would send me to a psych ward and I would be prescribed an anti-psychotic medication, possibly a diagnosis similar to yours. I would be carefully monitored to the point where if I said anything suspicious I could be locked up and force fed drugs for months, even years... I would go on for years telling everyone I had such and such disorder and so on and so forth.
Fortunately I was well versed in these affairs and simply ordered whatever invading energy/presence was encroaching on me out of my space. It was solved in 10 seconds.
Later on the old lady comes home and I find that she had been heavily drinking that night. Instantly I knew that the psychic encroachment that occurred was alcohol energy; due to my entanglement with her and the engagement with the 'spirits' of alcohol and the mind altering effects that brings about, it was as if I was intoxicated and had the same aura opening as if I had been drinking myself. I did a simple intention to unentangle with her and never experienced such a thing again while living there.
Now, to tie this all back to your question. So long as you maintain the disposition that you actually have a medical disorder or such and that you 'need' drugs to deal with it, I do not recommend further pursuing anything on the psychic or spiritual domain. It will not end well. Because, what is causing your maladies are already non-physical in origin. Developing capabilities that further enhance your attunement to the non-physical would simply amplify what you call a negative symptom.
If I were in your situation, I would go off medication, then embark on a path of seriously reconnecting with my body and the earth and removing all foreign interferences. Don Juan and the sorcerors used to actually bury their apprentices in the earth for up to 9 days when they had interference from inorganic beings. That being said, this is what I would do, and I cannot speak for you or recommend you do anything because ultimately you are the one steering your ship.
Best of luck!
Thank you.
Np
Oh, and one thing I forgot to mention; the energy body or double has even less sobriety than the physical person. So, whatever you are experiencing could be exacerbated if you awaken your energy body.
It's like a genie in a bottle and nearly impossible to put back. I awakened mine prematurely and mine is still attuning to all kinds of crazy energies in the second attention to the point I would call it 'schizophrenic'. I've spent years trying to discipline it and take control of it.
Anybody who is not in a directly similar situation to you, or who doesn’t have a background in psycho-pharmacology, is not qualified to give advise on this.
There are some people who’ve passed through here in the past few years who had mental illness issues. What was most apparent was that they had talent, but also great difficulty growing that talent into a reliable and functional skillset, because their episodes would usually derail their progress.
Whether that can be attributed to not being on the right meds, shitty living situations, or having buried trauma that hasn’t been addressed thru recapitulating…
I’d like to think that if someone is on the right meds and their non-optimal neurochemistry is closer to baseline, that they are then on more or less equal footing with everyone else. In which case their looser assemblage point is a decided advantage , and it all boils down to discipline and repetitive work on silencing the inner monologue, which is hell for everyone (inner silence is itself the best of medicines).
Thank you for the input.
Thank you for sharing your journey, I pray you find the answer you need.
In my exp. Interacting with the bad element exacerbates problems you may have. Its more energy for them to feed on.
Silence would be rather good for you. Turn off the constant input.
Additionally examine all thought as they come up.
Thinking of an orange? where did that come from. see an orange? see an orange tree? see a juice box in the grocery store? ....etc with practice you can isolate what is from you and what is not from you. And can ignore or blank out the input not of your making.